The night before

The Night Before: Two Suitcases, Big Feelings, and a One-Way Ticket to Adventure

So here I am. It’s the night before I fly off to Vanuatu. The hotel room is quiet. My brain is not.

There are two suitcases sitting in the room, both giving me very strong “you’re dreaming if you think we’re under 30kg” energy.

Apparently, when you try to fit a whole life into two suitcases, some very important questions arise:
Do I really need three pairs of sandals? (Yes.)
How many dresses is too many dresses? (No such thing.)
Do I need my favourite mug? (Emotionally yes. Logistically… questionable, but it was a gift from Clair.)

What I have learned is that every extra t-shirt has a trade-off. If I keep the linen pants, something else must die. Possibly the hair straightener. Possibly my dignity. And somewhere in all of this is the quiet, slightly panicked wondering: How much is overweight baggage these days and can I emotionally handle finding out at the airport?

Stay tuned.

Before I go any further, I want to say a huge, heartfelt thank you to everyone who donated to VSA. Your generosity doesn’t just support me – it helps ensure more volunteers can head into communities and roles that are genuinely needed. It matters. It really does. I carry a lot of gratitude with me. For those that sent me a koha I am extraordinarily grateful - it will buy copious quantities of mosquito repellent amongst other things.

Emotionally, I’m sitting somewhere between “Wheeee adventure!” and “Why have I voluntarily done this to myself?” The nerves and excitement are tag-teaming my nervous system.

To make things extra spicy or picey as Missy would say, my first week is already chocka:

• Life admin in a brand-new country
• Learning Bislama (halo olketa pressure)
• Starting my new job on Tuesday

Nothing like easing into things gently, right?

But underneath all of that is a very deep sense of privilege. I get to do this. I get to step into a role with real meaning. I get to contribute, learn, grow, and hopefully make a small difference. That’s not lost on me for a second.

The last couple of weeks have been a beautiful blur of dinners, hangs, coffees, hugs, and “just one more catch-up.” Thank you to everyone who made time. You have filled my cup in ways I didn’t even realise I needed.

Saying goodbye has been the hardest part. Leaving Emz, Rips, Eli, Cy, Poppy, Missy and Apollo has cracked my heart a little. Leaving the G-Spot — the place where I began to heal — has been surprisingly emotional too. That place holds a lot of my story.

Today also featured my official last lunch before departure, shared with Smithy and Birss. Honestly… who else would my last lunch be with? It felt entirely on brand.

I suspect I’ll be learning Churchill quotes at school next week purely in their honour — possibly delivered with great gravitas and questionable accents.

It was also my last day at work. While insurance was never destined to be my lifelong calling, it taught me a huge amount — about people, problem-solving, and myself. And I genuinely had the best boss I’ve ever had, which makes me a very lucky girl. Feeling grateful, reflective, and quietly proud as I close this chapter.

Ending my final night with dinner with Joy feels exactly right. Mentor. Friend. Absolute legend. Also, the person I want to be when I grow up. If I become even 20% of her, I’ll be doing okay.

Current status:
Passport – check
Visa – check
Flights – check
Luggage – check-ish
Immunisations – check

Tomorrow, the learning begins.
New foods.
New language.
New culture.
New role.
New me.
And let’s not forget… that glorious Vanuatu tropical climate (hello humidity, I see you).

Deep breaths. Early night (in theory). Big adventure ahead.

Bring it on, Vanuatu. 🌴✈️